See you on Planet Orgasm

I'll let you in on a secret. I'm a woman. I masturbate almost daily. I have a husband. He's hung and knows (mostly) what he's doing with it. But yet I still cannot turn loose of this thing





This is called a Pocket Rocket and many, many women rely on them.


Comes in pink too.

Now what's the big deal here? Why can't I let it go?

I've had one of these for nigh on 15 years.. one version or another. I found my very first one in a storage box the other day, and it still worked. Now that's a product well made right there. Probably in China.

Anyway, I gave great thought as to why, despite being so dang happy with my husband, I still turn to this daily. Am I oversexed? Do I have to have it that much? Is is just routine, tradition, whatever?

I figured out this much. It's comforting. It's an old friend. It's been around 3 times as long as my husband. It fits in my damn purse, and I've been known to pull off and get off when the urge strikes.

Ok. You're right. I might be oversexed.

But. Sex with the husband is a friggin cardio workout. He works hard to ensure my happiness, when in fact if he could just vibrate up next to me, no penetration, I would get off a lot faster. It's like Pavlov's pussy. You buzz and my labia perk up.

So when I want to just "get my fix" without the hassle of talking, fake moaning, messy bodily fluids and having to up my heart rate, I go back to my little friend. When I need some exercise I turn to the tripod I call my husband.

I can't recommend these little rockets enough though. They got me thru hard times and lack of hard times... *ahem*. If you haven't tried one, for God's sake look on Ebay, google, whatever. They're worth every single penny you'll save on watered down drinks at the bar trying to find a man who can get you off and then go away without giving you a disease.

Plus, it's like an apple a day. An orgasm a day keeps me happy.

That's my public service annoucement to open this blog. Masturbate more. Encourage more young women to use one of these. God, if I'd only known back then... I could have saved myself so much bullshit.

I even gave one of these to my 63 yr old mother for her birthday last year. She said she wanted one. Has no idea how to really use it, but we aren't having that conversation. She has to learn that on her own. I told her to take a Valium, go to bed and just relax. You'll get it.

The cost of one AA battery is a small price to pay for ensured happiness. I buy mine at Costco.